I’m actually grateful that this one was taken out of my hands.

As much as I’d like to control the outcome, prove the intent behind my actions, make a smooth transition in the lobby for friendship in lieu of romantic attachment, this is the way it needed to be. My meddling in my own mess would only serve to complicate and ficklize (that should be a word) the process of healing that has already begun.

I love him. I will always love him. I’m grateful for the wonderful time we had together, the experience of feeling cherished and the magnitude of what I learned about myself from knowing him. The fact that I can’t see him as my life partner doesn’t change any of that. Whether he accepts or rejects my friendship doesn’t change it. He’s still a beautiful, kind, gentle, funny and loving, – major – step in my evolution and will always hold a piece of my heart.

Goodbye, sweet B. May the sun always shine on your journey and thank you for loving me the best way you knew how.

∞ E

Advertisements